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Trigger Warning. How I Thought I Was Dying and Some Great Domains at Auction this Monday

Trigger Warning. How I Thought I Was Dying and Some Great Domains at Auction this Monday

spoiler alert, I'm ok

Shane Cultra
April 28, 2025

I have a condition that causes my brain to go into fight or flight mode—aka panic attack. I never had it as a kid, and it’s not like the things you see on TV where you get the warning, “The following contains flashing lights,” but it’s sort of the same. Mine is built into my peripheral vision—the very edge of my eyesight, which is very strong. It’s something they test at your doctor to see how good your sight is. Mine is way above average in range. That’s unfortunately the issue. My brain picks up stuff but can’t quite make it out. Which is fine… unless it’s a flicker or something that comes in and out, and my brain doesn’t know what to do. So I get dizzy and nauseous.

A few things that are tough for me are driving and having light peek through trees, roadside fences, or poles. I’m good for about a minute, and then it gets rough. When I first got it a few years ago, I thought I was having a heart attack since I had never had my body go into that state—fast breathing, couldn’t catch my breath—and it sent me into my first-ever panic attack. It was pretty scary. I went in for testing and stayed in the hospital just in case. Got cleared, and then it happened on a drive two weeks later to the point I had to pull over. Same thing. Panic attack. I knew something was wrong. More tests on the brain and vascular system in my neck and head. Nothing.

So we started the psychological route. What was the trigger? This was one of the types of tests, and after a minute, I can’t watch it or it triggers. Now that I know, I don’t have panic attacks—I just look away. If it’s lights, I get into a lane or move my visor to cover it. I also know to focus on something in front of me and drop my side vision. It’s the craziest thing, and I never had it before. I could wear glacier glasses (with side covers), but I haven’t needed them now that I know what’s going on.

I share this because once I did, I found a few others who’ve dealt with panic attacks and thought they just had mental issues—when really, it’s about finding the trigger. They aren’t crazy; they just have a trigger. Often, it’s not as simple as mine, so I don’t mean to diminish what others are going through. Mine was definitely concerning when I first got it, and for 6 months to a year, I was scared. I’m very fortunate I have a lot of friends who are doctors and helped me. I was able to get in for all the tests despite not showing any physical issues. When I went in for the stress test, I crushed it because I was in the middle of marathon training. I was like, “If it’s my heart, I’d be dead—I go through a stress test every day.” But people pass those all the time until they die on a run from the widowmaker or buildups. Your body can compensate for anything—until it doesn’t.

Fortunately, so far so good, and now I have a baseline for when the real problems come on.

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